He Shows up Right Where You Are!



Gods love. What do we know of Gods love? How deep is it embedded in your heart, soul, mind?

Coming into DTS I was looking to know God more, and about myself, but to begin a relationship with God. Go deeper with Him. Never before I thought you needed a real relationship with God. I honestly thought you can get by with just some prayers here and there, and go to church. I never really lived a day where I completely relied on him for strength, provision, guidance, etc..

Our class was into the second week... I was struggling. I was completely lost and empty. I couldn't hear Jesus speaking to me or noticing his presence. In those quiet times I would sit there, on a rock or under a tree, starring out in the distance. It was so awkward for me, not really understanding the point of quiet time. Read a couple verses or a chapter in the Bible. Okay, what did I get out of that read? Do I pray now? Doubt started to roll through my mind and why I was even there. But I was just flat out broken and frustrated. 

It was Thursday and that morning, before class, we had worship time. Even during the worship songs I felt so out of place but I began to pray. I was desperate. "Jesus I need your presence, I want to feel and know your presence. I need to know that you are truly alive and in me. Father fill me with your love." I kept repeating the same thing over and over again. Now, this was all to myself. I wasn't praying out loud. Literally not a minute after my prayer one of the DTS staff members came over to me and started praying. She didn't ask anything, or say anything to me but just prayed. Unfortunately, it was all in Portuguese so I have no idea what she prayed for but it was God working. During her prayer I had that fuzzy feeling and warmth. I felt full and alive. She eventually finished praying and I was beginning to ask questions. "God was that your love? Was that your presence? Was that you God?" Again not a minute later another DTS staff leader came over and began praying over me. He finished and immediately I had to sit down and tears started rushing down my face, snot running out of my nose. My face was a mess!! What in the world is this God?! But after I gathered my self together I came to the realization, that was Gods love! I asked for it the first prayer and He gave it. He filled me. I asked again but my body was already full! I couldn't hold anymore and so those tears, and snot, were making room for more love! And He showed I can overflow you with my love. From what I can remember that was actually the first time I have ever experienced God in any way. I was in awe...

 But the day was not done yet.

Later that evening one of the staff members, that prayed over me, pulled me aside and had some awesome words.

"God was telling me to share this with you, but while I was praying for you God was showing me your heart." My mouth dropped. "He said that your heart is beautiful and is so big. The devil is scared of your heart because it is so big and it wants longing for God, its so open for God." Whaaaaaaat. I didn't even know what my own heart looked like. He took the time and looked in my heart! How amazing is that?!
 

In all this God showed his love. Not only did He overflow me with his love but He went even further and told me what my own heart looks like. That day He came to me right where I was. I was confused, frustrated, lost but I just asked for his help and He came right away. His love for us is amazing! A week before, the class topic was about Identity in Christ. We spent some time in the book of Ephesians and its so deep, telling us that we were chosen before the world was formed, we are adopted into His family. He calls us his sons and daughters. I could keep going and going but God freely gives us everything that we need. Every day He prepares us for the day, for the obstacles and bumps in the road ahead. He never abandons us but is continually by our side waiting for us to grab his hand for help.

That week really changed me. I didn't view God as just something above us anymore. But now as my Father. I saw how BIG He really is, that he's able to give some of his love to me that its flowing over the brim. And that He created me! He knows me enough that He can describe the heart that's inside of me. In your troubles you don't have to run and search for God but He is right there waiting for you to say I need your help Father. Lay down your own strength and rely on His unfailing, never empty, Love!

Comments

  1. Experiencing God's presence is the best thing ever, thanks for sharing your story now and also u blessed me when u still shared with me on Christmas day with my family, how you gave up your iPhone so u could concentrate on Him during your outreach, that was real giving up your right of communication, that torched me how desperate u were for God and didn't want to miss out anything , we were blessed by your team,
    May God's favor and all he taught you during your DTS be a blessing to all u will share with out there.
    Cant wait to here your next step after DTS

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